Morangos com Acucar is BACK!

If you missed the Fun episodes of the 2 season of "morangos com acucar"(strawberries with sugar), if you miss me, or if you miss Adam (R.I.P.)... you can catch up with the episodes, playing every morning on TVI, and if you can, record them for me, cuz i never got the chance to watch it!... Thanks...

P.S.: now just for curiosity, how many black people you see in this picture, that represents a whole cast of a Soap Opera!?...

Soundtrack: Hip-Hop Dont Stop, by: Boss AC.

# 7 on the countdown!

Oh well, a couple of months ago, i was looking for an agency, actually no, my sister had gone to an agency open call, she came home crying cuz the woman there said that she should lose weight and come back later on the year! That woman turn out to be my Agent, Angies, why? cuz the next open call the agency had, i showed up, just to see how good i was yet to be part of this business! It went well, i'm now part of the Angies Family! The week after she called, to go to an audition in Toronto, for a music video, she said i would go in the car with Chris, we both were auditionning... interesting, time to meet a colegue! Me and Chris drove to Toronto for the audition and we got it, we both got it, it was our first audition and our first job in Canada! The video was for Kardinal Offishall, i was like: "cool a video for a group"... it happens that after calling a couple of friends to know if they knew about the band, they said: "Paulo, its not a band, its a rapper"...LOL... very known around here indeed! He has worked with Rihana, Nelly Furtado and so on... he is big around the pop comercial music world...
The video we shot, was "feel alright", it was a cool day, in a Boxing place, we were pretending we're all fighters! We had to fight an old man, with a full grey head, that aparently won all the sets! LOL... Great concept!
Yeah.. this same video is now # 7 on the countdown... i hope it goes up (for my 12 hours of work)
Kardinal Holla At Ya... i know about your contract with Pepsi (is that really your house?)
Aight!
Peace!

Soundtrack: Everyday Rudeboy, by: Kardinal Offishall!

Chico Adam (R.I.P.) Os 3 Fajutos!

The meaning of Fajutos, dont ask me cuz not even i know what it means... we just know that we were all Fajutos! Paulo, Adam and Me, we met shooting the soap opera, Morangos com Acucar (strawberries with sugar), in Portugal! Paulo was the main character of the serie (Fred), i was his best friend (Luca), and Adam was the brother of his girlfriend Alice (Dino)... i remenber the first day i got to the studios, Adam came to me, saying: Welcome! We had met before downtown lisbon, i couldnt forget his eyes so clear like the blue of the Hawaiian water, Paulo was the boyfriend of a good friend of mine, Cinha Jardim, i met him with her one night out, he was the typical latino macho-man, hot as hell, no smiles, always serious! LOL... that day i discovered i was gonna play his best friend... our first scene was like:

(Luca and Fred look at each other)

(Luca and Fred hug each other)

(Luca and Fred hug once again)

(Luca and Fred hug again and smile at each other)...

In the soap-opera we were really good friends! But for some reason in real life our personalities were having a big trouble conecting, out of the recording space, we would argue or not even talk sometimes... in between Paulo and Adam, everything was different, they bonded, i would see them hanging around all the time!

I cant explain exactly how it happenned i just know that after 6 months of shooting together somehow we got the chance to know each other better... and the good vibe of the sitcom was transported to real life, suddenly we were "inseparable"! The 3 Fajutos, we were so into each other that we started living together, they moved into my place! It was Heaven... i mean... in between partying, shooting, girls and signing autographs, that was our lifes, always with somewhere to go, even if it was make a 5 hour trip to go see "Dzrt" (the band of the soap-opera) or travel to eat seafood... Paulo was like the father figure (GOD), he would drive us all over, Me and Adam were the crazy ones... the Angels (white and black), thats how some fans would call us... we were all over the place! Even when Paulo was out, or tired to go out, we would do our party... Lisbon was under control, we owned it! But then Octuber came and i had to come to NYC for a show, and i never went back... things started happening here for me, i was done with the soap, and i decided to stay a lil longer, and a lil longer and a lil longer... up till now... my house i left it with Paulo, my home is your home, i have in him a friend, a brother... as for Adam!

Adam, had a car accident april 16th this year, and... he passed away... he was only 22 years old!

This is hard... if i only knew that the day they took me to the Aeroport (picture), was going to be the last day i saw him, if i only knew that day they called me, all drunk, it was the last time i heard his voice... there is nothing i would've changed... cuz we never had problems saying: I love you or I miss you!

We enjoyed every single moment we had together! Adam is the one that started calling me: "Pasky", baby pasky... basicly all my portuguese friends call me Pasky=Pascoal. Once he was so drunk he wanted to sleep, Paulo was busy in the bed-room, and we had to sleep together... and he said: "wow i'm going to sleep with the prince, i feel so honored" and he kept repeating it, till he fell asleep... LOL... he was hilarious! With all the traveliing that i do, Adam once asked: "what is the trip of your dreams?"

i said: "i already made it, coming to portugal"

he said: "mine is to come back to earth"

Stop, think! Adam, was like an Angel... curly blond hair, blue eyes and a babyface, it took a sec to anyone to call him "Anjinho", with a great sense of humour, always smily and happy, he was the favorite character of the kids, "Dino" everybody loved "Dino", in between us, he brought live to the studios every morning even Patricia the producer (some would say: upset lesbian) was in love with him... now when i see the episodes with Adam and Me... i cant think of anything else but the fact that i wish i spent more time with him... more of those perfect times! I also cant help but think that if i was in Lisbon i would've been inside of that car, with them, where only one, out of 4, survived!

Me and Paulo, Paulo (2x), are now left in the world, with no Adam, but i'm sure he is watching over us... he is doing his JOB!

Adam, just make sure you dont party too much up there! Adam its a party himself! Take it easy on the rest of the Angels...

As for Paulo (the sexiest man in portugal, statisticly prooved by public viewer).... We keep it Real and Tight! He is buying a new house, and i dont know how is it gonna be for me back there... i'm so scared! They made me feel home! The truth is that being far somehow helps me overcome easily, i havent been there ever since that happenned... do i want to go? I heard our house was invaded by the fans searching for a solid memory of Adam!

P.S.: enjoy every moment of your life, express yourself, you never know when someone is not gonna be around!

Soundtrack: Angel of Mine by: Eternal!

Romeo and Juliet?! Will Work for Food!

A couple of years ago in New York City, i went to "Escuelita" a famous dance club for the black and hispanic comunity also known for the its strippers and for the porn movies, every now and then they do a party to release a porn movie... Big Ben is one of my friends... the owner and producer (but hey i never did a porn)! LOL... even tho he has invited me several times! Normally we go have breakfast together... Me, Big Ben and Moses... and they keep on saying: "when you think you cant do this anymore, we'll make you a porn star"
So at least i'll have a future anyhow! LOL...
Continuing... i went there for the 1st time... and there was this: Stripper... Romeo (i mean, how can you not love a guy called Romeo?)... he wasnt the type of beauty i would be attracted to, but his moves were driving me crazy, he had a muscular body and he could move every single muscle in it! I was drewling!
At the time i was in a relationship so i kept the image in my mind but i wouldnt harm my relationship for a night with a stripper!
Years passed, exactly 2 years, and somehow i had still the image in my head: "his curved body drowned in sweat, moving like a snake..."
So one night i decided to pay a visit to the Club again!
And for my suprise, he was still there... dancing his ass off... his body was even better, he had shaven his head... i was drewling as much or more as the first time!
I was single! So, it was the time to make the Move!
I went up to him, and put a dollar bill on the side of his underwear, i looked at him in the eye and when i was leaving he asked: "what are you doing later?"
i said: "i'm having breakfast with you"
he smiled and said: "i'll leave at 2am, wait for me then"
I got all excited, the move had been perfect, i went to the bar and started drinking apple martinis...
2am, he was ready... and i was drunk and hard as a piece of iron!
The closest place open was the McDonalds on 8th Ave and 45st... so there we headed!
During the "Happy Meal", we talked a bit, but he couldnt stop eating... after dancing the whole night i'm sure he had to feed the body, the 19 year old puerto-rican body!
I asked: "so what are your plans for the night?"
Romeo: "i thought i was going to chill at your place, i live in queens man, i cant go there now, my ride is gone" (with the yoh yoh puerto-rican accent, that only made him more attractive)
We jumped to my old dodge van, and he said, he wanted to drive... i have to admit that it was probably one of the hugest mistakes i had made, cuz he had never driven before, and it was just scary... but fun, we couldnt stop laughing, we knew the cops could've stopped us anytime, but we didnt care much, we were both young and restless! Looking for Trouble (literaly)! We bonded!
We got downtown, to chambers st. Safe! There was my apartment, we went up 8 floors, and once i close the door... we started fooling around...
I cant really explain what i felt, it just felt like i was getting something that i've wished for very long! I couldnt Stop, and i didnt care about anything else but possess him!
The clothes were gone and when i was about to introduce "myself in himself"
I heard a breathless but strong: STOP!
"Anh? Stop? Why?" i wondered...
He said: "I'm H.I.V. positive"
I was in shock... not for the new, that was so abruptly said, but for the fact that, this guy had just "saved my life of what could've been a huge mistake i would not have the chance to fix ever"... i didnt have a condom on... i wasnt thinking, and i would've regret it for the rest of my life!
(a lesson of a lifetime, he could've been quiet, or ashamed and now i would've been infected)
I saw tears running out of his eyes, i held him strong, and with no more words we both fell asleep. In the morning we woke up playing as if nothing had happenned... just like 2 brothers... i never asked for an explaination... we hang out for days and days... he told me the story after a long time... his life is the life of lots of boys his age in NYC... a prostitute mother and a pimp father... all he wanted to do was to be a MAN, and be able to survive on his own! Not an easy due in a city like NY with his background! Being around me, helped him, leave the club scene, he stopped dancing and decided to go back to school to finish his degree, i'm so happy i helped in that sense, all i want is his happiness. My drive lessons helped him get a license... i remenber once we got stuck in the highway with no gas... he just couldnt stop driving! Sometimes we would drive Upstate (white planes) and crash in the car for the night, with no heater, in the winter! We used to breakdance in the subway station and make money to go eat at the "applebees" or sing with a lil stereo in TimeSquare! Romeo is a great singer... once he sang for me: "let me love you", and gosh... it was off the hook! oh shit! WOW... good times good times! We also fought several times over Girls, he taught me how to be a Player! I mean there are so many crazy things we've done as the day he took me to meet his parents... LOL... and when i took him to meet mine! It was Hilarious! He was so nervous he couldnt stop talking! This is another person that makes my life worth living, that teach me how to live to an extreme... and show me that there is always a way to overcome a problem, cuz there is others with even more problems and some even cronical... those will never go away, such as H.I.V.!
I Love you Romeo! Hey, would that make of me Juliet? LOL...

P.S.: Now that i started, i will not stop until i can share with the world the stories of the People that has influenced, contribuited and changed my life!

Soundtrack: Let me Love You, by: Mario!

QUICKY a la Francaise! (what a coincidence!)

I was spending a chill afternoon in the couch of my house watching French TV! Zapping in between "Canadian Idol, French Sitcoms, Oprah and The News", there it was, a face that caught my attention... a beautifull smile! He was the host of a tv show, interviewing two quebecois stars... i couldnt understand much, but there i was mesmorized by the energy and sympathy with which he was running his own show! I caught myself smiling several times, just by looking at him smile!

And thinking... "why i never meet people like that in the streets?" (i do meet them, they are all the friends i have) LOL... its true... but somehow, my day wasnt the best... after missing my trip to Paris! I was feeling like... i needed a friend... but far from home, and with my friends travelling... my only chance was going to the streets and see if i could eventually meet some new ones! (sometimes i'm needy like that)

After a long shower, enough lotion to hidrate my dry body skin, jeans, t-shirt and sandals... there i was looking fresh ready to have dinner with myself... yes, with myself!

I took a cab to Saint Laurent... the street was packed, the night was warm, everyone was friendly... i chose a restaurant to eat, by the look, ordered my food and after i head to another bar terrace to have a couple of drinks just so i could kill my inhibition...

Barman: "what would you like to drink?"

Me: "long island, please"

we were about 10 people in the terrace, i sit in the bar...

Barman: "i dunno why its so dead tonight, the weather is nice!"

Me: "true, where do you think everybody go?"

Barman: "i dunno i think Maddo, every tuesday they have a Drag show that is very good, everybody goes there, too bad, cuz i wanted to make some good money today"

I felt sorry, his intention of making money was totally going to be a failure but i felt like i need to help, so i thought: "i might stick around for a little bit, and give him some good tips"...

We instantly started talking, his name is Dennis, tall, muscular, white kid from Calgary!

He was starving so the security had gone for his Sushi, when the security came, the 3 of us chat about the Movie Festival that is happenning now in the city, soccer, planes and nightclubs... it was a very interesting talk... totally un-expected!

2 hours later, 4 long islands, and my 20 dolars tips... i was feeling, lets say: Tipsy! So i needed to go for a walk and clear up my mind... i said: "ciao guys, take it easy..."

Barman: "hey, go to Maddo, i'm going there after this, see you later"

I found it very curious that he was telling me that, cuz i never showed any kind of interess in having him as my companion for the night, but somehow it sounded good... he is Hot!

I walked... i wasnt sure of where Maddo was, cuz i've never been there... but as he said, it wasnt hard to find, cuz the whole crowed was there!

I stopped at the door to finish my smoke, a drag-queen came to me right away, claiming that i was hot, she kept pulling my t-shirt up, and showing me of to the rest of the peeps... i was very embarassed, but she made her point, she got me" "familiarized with the rest"... i was no longer an "alone guy desperate for some attention", i had gotten my "Ego Treat".

Inside of the bar... WOW... drag-queens all over... the show was very well done... we all know how drag shows are... Gloria Stephan, Madonna, Janet Jackson, Bonnie Taylor, Cher, Annie Lennox... i've seen them all... LOL... then it was time for a break and the drag host was talking, in french, saying that they had some new guests... some artists "in tha house"...

And she yelled: Eric (something)...

people was cheering and yelling... the Eric was Ok... i wasnt sure what kind of star he was... he climbed up to the stage, they talked for 30 sec... and then seemed like the Eric wasnt alone... so he called another star: Patricia (her face was familiar, she does one of the sitcoms i tried to watch during the afternoon)... then Patricia called: Jessica... (the people was going nuts, and i couldnt understand exactly why, but the fact that they were famous)... then Jessica called: Alexis!

(my heart stopped beating)

Pboom Pboom Pboom!

Everything started moving is slow motion!

Alexis was the TV Host guy i was so entusiastic watching his show in the afternoon! Yes, that same guy... i thought: "why i never meet people like that in the streets?" the same guy i smiled everytime i saw him smile", the same guy i was mesmorized by his energy and sympathy!

SLAP SLAP SLAP me, Bitch! (God is challenging me)

I started laughing, it was just too much of a coincidence... but then if we are aware, a coincidence is never a coincidence... there is always a message behind it, and whatever that one was, i was about to find out!

I decided to go to the bar, and get a beer... so i could plan my aproach to them, without looking like a "Star Chaser", of course saying what i'm saying now, and going up to him to say that i was watching him this afternoon on tv, would sound ridiculous, he would think i am a Fan, but i dont even watch tv... so i needed to be cautious! There was one thing i was sure of: "i have to meet him".

I stood at the bar, preparing my trap, and still enjoying the show! When... the group of the 4 quebecois stars comes close and ask me for space so they could use the bar...

I moved a lil... all i wanted was the "3 sec eye contact" with Alexis... but he never looked...

I noticed that the girls were already looking at me... i looked back... and one of the girls, Patricia, made me a sign with her hands as: "come here"...

i pretended i didnt see it, in fact, i wanted somebody else... no girls for tonight!

Then... after they gossip a little, Eric (the queen of the group) decided to make the move!

Eric: "my friends think you are cute"

Me: "thanks"

Eric: "are you american?"

Me: "no, i'm portuguese"

Eric: "Oh, portuguese tres bien, is your first time here?"

Me: "Yes"

(i was being short cuz sometimes i want somebody and i end up being with the friend, so i was avoiding that shit to happen)...

Eric went back to their spot... they were talking, i could tell, about me... and then... there it was...

3 sec eye contact with Alexis... he looked and he waved... LOL... I had spread my poison!

Eric came back asking me to go join them, i did, we introduced ourselves, and while Eric was hardly trying to make his move on me, Alexis was just chilling with the girls, dancing and playing... he is really funny and whatever energy he showed on the show, it was just his natural way of being!

Alexis: "do you wanna go for a smoke?" (with very strong french accent)

Me: "yeah i do"

Alexis: "they dont smoke, so we can go"

Me: "aight man, lets go"

During the smoke, we got to know each other better... it was a nice talk... my goal was done! I met the guy!

I never said anything about the tv show... we went back in... we danced with the girls and then it was their time to go home... we said Bye!

They were Gone!

I felt, lets say: Sorry! But it was ok, my short night had already been full of surprises!

I kept enjoying the everlasting Drag show, its a whole night of shows, and they were fun!

When... somebody pulled my arm... It was Alexis again!

LOL... oh wow... i knew trouble was coming!

Alexis:"what are you having?"

Me: "coca-cola"

Alexis:"no alcohol?"

Me: "nope, where are your friends?"

Alexis:"they left, do you want another one"

I had more than half of the cup full, so no need for another one... i showed him

Alexis: " you are hot"

Me: "so are you"

Alexis: "do you wanna come to my place"

Me: "i rather go to mine"

Alexis: "where is yours?"

Me": "Ontario, Ontario St"

Alexis: "mine is really close"

Me: "mine is not far"

Alexis: "so what you wanna do?"

Me: "do you want to go now?!"

Alexis: "yes, did you ever fuck in french?"

Me: "did you ever fuck in portuguese?"

Alexis: "french is not as big as portuguese"

Me: "i'm sure it isnt"

Alexis: "i've never been fucked"

(i hear that everyday)

Me: "me neither"

Alexis: "lets go"

We took a cab, once we got to my place, he started taking his clothes of... and then we started kissing... violently kissing...

Alexis: "i'm happy i'm with you"

Me: (no response)

Alexis: "let me eat it" (looking at my Oscar)

( the boy was nasty, loud and agressive)

i throw him in my bed (he is stronger but smaller than me, shorter) we were fooling around, he couldnt shut his mouth up...

I grabbed a condom...

Alexis: "wait, you are too big, i've never been fucked, let me fuck you"

Me: "no no no, i'll be easy with you"

Alexis: "please"

Me: "relax"

It didnt take more than 2 minutes, even tho he tried to avoid it, there it was the signs of Pleasure!

Alexis: "i'm sorry, you are too much, i got too excited"

(i smiled)

we were both really exausted just for those 2 minutes...

Alexis: "i have to go i work tomorrow at 8.30am"

Me: "yeah, i need to sleep too, i'm going back home tomorrow"

Alexis: "will i ever see you again?"

(i love to play the mysterious, i never answered)

we got dressed, i got a cab for him...

Alexis: "my number is 993.... can you memorize it, call me when you are back"

Me: "we will meet... ciao"

I totally inverted the situation, when he could've had been in control... now all i have to do, is wait for the scenes of the next episode!

And even now i just cant believe that i Fucked the guy i saw on TV that same afternoon! What a coincidence!

Soundtrack: I Saw the Sign, by: Ace of Base!

Busy(mess) Days in O-town!

After a long Thursday night in Montreal with Danielle, Rodolfo and Yerko... i woke up at 7am, Friday the 25th
I got to Ottawa from Montreal, at 11.30am, my ride home got to the station at 12(noon)...
My first job was at 1pm, but i should had gone to MAC on Rideau Center at 12.30pm for make up and hair...
I never made it, cuz i had to go home first get my car and then go to the shooting, as i couldnt had done the make up and hair at the center, i went straight to the shooting place and did it on my own!
LOL...
What a mess!
I was shooting a print ad for a the t-shirt label "Daisy" (which means: Native of)! Like, i'm daisy of Africa!
And i had as companion, Helex my agents adorable daughter!
At 3.30pm i had my second job of the day... with Giant Tiger, for the winter flyer coming out sept. 20th... and so i was released from the first shooting at 3pm... but i had the wrong address, and when i got there at 4pm, half hour later...
i was tired and stressed out, around 4pm the roads here get busy, it was hot out, and i hate having the AC on... allergic to AC... i got to the place... parked the car, went straight in...
when... i see this 3 "personnes" i've never seen, giving me a nasty look... knocking their foot on the ground as if saying: "we are tired of waitting for you".
I though: "shit, now i am fucked"
I looked at them and said: "ok, i surrender"
They started cracking laughing at me, like: "we are so mean, poor kid"
Then one of the Giant Tiger representants said: "we had a whole dialogue ready to put you down (they had half hour of prepare it)... but after seeing your face, we just couldnt go ahead... lets work"
I got dressed and... flash flash flash... i heard: "we got it"... and done!
What a really like about working with giant tiger (second time they contract me), is the fact that they pay 75 dolars per hour, but you only shoot for 5 minutes and you are gone!
Next thing i know is my mom has the flyer hanging in the friedge door, with all the information about the sales of the store... its hilarious!
After i was done with G.T. i had to go back to my prior shooting... but it was late... so Jef Harris (the photographer) said i could go home.
But... i didnt.. i passed by my agency to see how is my schedule so i could leave to Paris... to see Madonna with my friends, Danielle, Oliver (in Switzerland) and Rodolfo (who is moving there today to study cook at Cordon Bleu)... and then after the agency, i had to go to make some fittings for the fashion shows organized by the Velvet Production and Stephan Klovan for the Pride Festivities in O-Town...the first fitting was sponsored by: Trustfund Stores... then i went to pick my friend David for an ice-cream... he came to the second fitting with me, sponsored by: Babyface Stores!
After dropping David back home, i was feeling like, i needed some rest it was already 9pm... but... Helex (my agent daughter) was doing a "Going Away" (to Italy) party... so i joined the Crew (Angies Crew- the name of a group of 12 models from my agency, incluiding me) lets say: Trustfull People with who we can share!... We went to "The Drink", i couldnt stay long cuz my friend Jason (that also moved to Montreal) was in Town, so i joined Jason for a Tequila shooter, at "Blue Cactus" with Marta and Michel... we had some Drama, but with Jason its already normal... LOL... (he is gonna kill me)... so much drama that i left tearing! We just get too emotional when Jason is drunk!... LOL... then... i went back to the Crew... they were waiting for me in my car... after we head to Kylies house, for some more drinks and chat... but... people was falling asleep, so me and Nathaniel (who just booked a reality show: Amazing Race, Congrats boy) decided to leave for more excitment and so, we got it and it was early saturday when once again i was finally laying down in my beautifull queen size bed!
Saturday 1pm, getting ready to leave the house...
4pm was the rehearsal of the benefit capital X magazine fashion show at Helsinki!
After hair and make up...
A couple of rehearsals... with lots of turns and turns...
A Sandwish of Cheese and Salad (thats all they gave us to eat)
The show only started at 11pm...
It was Good... could be better... always...
Then we left to party a little .. horrible skectched-out environment, models and drugs... sometimes doesnt quite work, they were freaking out... hating each other for no reason... alucinating!
And so for me the party was over... back home... slept... not much...
Sunday, 12(noon) awake, back to work...
At VIVA, bank street!
Funny is that everytime i do one of those (free of payment jobs for charity) i say: "i'll not do this again" and why?
Cuz they are for free and they are always the less organized and they take forever... Almost 10 hours of work, yes... forever, sometimes no food, no assistence,, they are some just ridiculous!... but today it was "FUN"...
I got to the the Babyface store and the show that was suppose to be at 2pm, had already been delayed to 4pm, they said:"you can go and come back"
LOL... of course, but if i did go, i would never come back, so i stick around...
There was a photographer hired to take pictures of us in the store clothes for them to use it for publicity and the catalogue... so it was fine, 4 hours would do...
4pm the show was about to start... but it was rainning and the show was outside... so we had to "wait a lil longer"...
After doing the first part of the show... the place wasnt really packed and Stephan (the contracter) wanted us to "wait a lil longer" for the public...
It was already 5.30pm and we were sent to eat.. this time, we could choose anything out of the menu.. LOL... so i had a "Chicken Quesadilla"...
At 6.30pm back to the store to change, and grab a "gay flag" to give it up to someone in the public and wish: "happy pride"...
It was scary to see the public, the scum of the after-hours, this people had been partying since friday, not sleeping, and they were there, just cuz there was loud music, and they still wanted to keep on partying... it was too much!
It was almost 9pm when i was going back home...
My Sisters were back from New York, it was my brother birthday (JP i'm sorry, now you know why, I Love you BRO), even tho he is in NYC, and i forgot about his birthday for the first time in my life, he sent me a beautifull Gift (those are HOT)... its been 2 months man, ouch!
The best thing is after crazy days of work, and my total exaustion, getting home, with my family, they are always so full of energy and they laugh and tell me stories... its just great!
But i cant stay any longer, cuz at 11.59pm... i'm taking the bus to Montreal...
That was my weekend...

"V" for "Virginity-Less"

It was a beautifull summer day, in Lisbon, the portuguese capital...
I had arriven in town for the summer holidays, from Spain, i decided to get a summer job.
I was 14 years old, went to the interview and got the job at "Virgin Megastore", located in Restauradores, meaning downtown Lisbon!
After I been working there for a couple of weeks, it definetly made me Love music even more, i was aware of all the new artists and albums, music in general, i was also a very good sells young teenager! LOL...
One of the days i was working and suddenly i see... i see the Woman that would make of me a Man (if having sex makes you a man anyway)
She was short, dark brown hair, very tanned skin, big brown eyes, beautifull lips... she was there... Looking for an Enrique Iglesias cd!
I asked if she needed help, she said yes, she looked at me in the eyes, i felt like a cupid narrow striking my heart, i wasnt confortable with the feeling, i was too young, and a bit shy, but i took her to the spot where she could listen to the cd.
I tried to keep on working, but... her eyes, her eyes were following me around, every move, every step i took...
My time to leave, came, it was time to go home... i went downstairs, undressed the uniform, and came back up, kind of expecting to see her again...
But she was gone!
I felt kinda disappointed, i felt like i should've had asked for a number, you know, kids talk!
Even tho she looked much older than me, i wasnt affraid to make a move, but it was too late, she was Gone!
I left the store... heading to the Metro Station (subway) when suddenly she is coming the other way, like, i was going down, she was coming up!
We crossed, our eyes interacted... there it was again, the LOOK!
I kept on going down, and she kept on going up!
I thought: "Shit i should've said something" then "imma go after her"
And so i did... i decided to go up towards her... and when i finally see her again... she was coming down! LOL... We crossed again!
I got desperate, affraid of being obvious and affraid of she thinking i was chasing her (and i was).
So I decided to go talk to her... i went down, and when i was about to say a word she said:
"Ola, tens esqueiro" or "Hi, do you have a lighter"
and i had, so i handed it to her...
There was the stupid akward silence while she was enjoying the first drags of her smoke!
I couldnt think of anything to say... so i said: "hey, do you have a sister called Mafalda?"
(obviously i totally made it up, i never knew a Mafalda in my life, but in the Cartoons) LOL...
She said: "no, do i look like her?"
I said: "yes, actually..." (there i was i had made my move)
We talked while walking, a lot, she asked me where my accent was from, i was living in spain at the moment, and her mother was spanish, she was from Madeira (one of the portuguese islands) and so we had a lot to talk about... we talked and talked... then we went to "Augusta Street" (its like a main street for consumers)... we sit in one of the tables and asked for a coffee... (i had never had coffee till that day, but somehow i didnt want her to think i was a kid)
I kept pretending i was an adult very well...
It was 4pm when i left work, and we talked so much that suddenly it was 11pm! We were talking for only 7 hours! I felt like i knew her my whole life... LOL... It was great!
I said i had to go home, she said she did too, i said we could share a cab, she said that it was ok, cuz we lived close by, but my stop was first, and then hers... she didnt mind!
During the talk she told me she was 25 years old! Thats only 11 years older than me! LOL...
I was In Love! It was Love at the first Sight! LOL... (says Kylie Minogue!)
She was the most beautifull thing i had ever seen! I said i was 19 years old!
She told me i was very Mature for my age! (can you imagine if i had said i was 14?) LOL...
We took the Cab... we kept on talking, i didnt know i could talk with someone for so long, but i was enjoying every single moment of it!
We got to my place, i asked if she wanted to say Hi to my aunt... she said Yes!
I used to live in a "Barrio" called Madredeus, it was only houses, small houses, with 2-3 floors and a garden... like little "American Dream", the Ex-president of Portugal, was my neighbour, his name was: Ramalhantes (is he dead yet?).
As i was just staying for the summer, i had my room in the actual living room of the house, so the front door would take us straight to my little room... we passed it, and we went to the dinning-room where my aunt was watching T.V., i introduced them, my aunt said: "WOW, you are beautifull" i felt so proud! She felt unconfortable!
Then we went back to my (living) room, and we decided to play the cd that she had just bought: Enrique Iglesias! LOL... we kept on talking... seriously i dont even remenber about what i just know that we talked so much so much, we always had something to talk about!
Then there was the akward silence again!
She asked me: "do you have the new Celine Dion cd?"
I said: "yes"
She said: "can you play it?" (her voice was like water to my ears, so clear and soft)
I said; "sure"
I grabbed the cd, and... Play!
She said: "Please put the song number 6, listen to the words, and imagine thats me talking... thats how i feel"
LOL... my english wasnt even good at the moment, but for some reason i understood it all!
The song said:
"i'm scared, so affraid to show i care...
will he think i'm weak, if i tremble when i speak...
what if, there is another one he is thinking of...
maybe he is in love, i'd feel like a fool... life can be so cruel... i dont know what to do...
... but what you must understand, you cant let the chance to love him pass you by...
tell him that the sun and moon rise in his eyes... and whisper tender words so soft and sweet...

hold him close to feel his heart beat...
... love will be the gift you give yourself..."
Those were the frases i could understand... and suddenly my heart started beating so so so fast!
My whole body was shaking, i couldnt speak, i was trembling sit in the table where the cd player was... she was in a chair in front of me... i felt like she could feel my body through the floor, it was like an earthquake...
She went down in her knees, and held my knees, i went down aproaching her face...
and there it was my "First Kiss"...
Her tongue felt like velvet caressing mine, i could feel her breath on my face, her smell, the touch of her hands in the back of my neck... i felt like i wanted to be there forever!
Like i could just "PAUSE"my Life!
We kissed, and we kissed, and we kissed... i couldnt stop shaking, but there was no need for words!
Then when we for a while stopped... i turned off the lights and guide her to my Mattress, cuz i had no bed, and i lighten some candels... i knew it was about to happen, i wanted to make it "Special"...
We lay down, all while kissing... then i said: "i've never done this before"
She said: "No? dont worry i'll take good care of you"
We both smiled... and there i was inside of her body! Such warm, cozy place i could live inside of her!
As if we had melt into ONE! As if there was nowhere else i wanted to be! As if i was finally a MAN!
The night fell and the morning rase! We didnt get much sleep! I was 14! LOL...
In the morning my aunt passed by my room to go to work... i felt so proud, i almost stood up naked in front of her... but she, she was embarassed!
We spent the whole day in Bed! It was amazing, i can still feel, chills when i think of it!

That was my First Time!

Reality Check: "of course we were never able to have a relationship, she kept on saying i was too young even tho i wanted to proove her wrong. We met 2 more times during that summer, one of them she took me to her house, she had 11 dogs, LOL... then i went back to Spain, and 6 years after i met her again, and we had sex, it was still amazing, now we talk pretty often and we even met last year before i came to Canada, she is married now, but what i want to say is that i'm happy for being able to have her still in my Life!"

Soundtrack: Could i have this kiss forever, by: Enrique Iglesias duet w/ Whitney Houston!

Total Audition Failure!

So... yeah... my head is upside down!
Yesterday i was in Toronto, for a PowerHouse casting...
I left Ottawa at 9.30am to go to the audition that would take place at the PowerHouse studios on Berkley street at 4.00pm...
The Bus got to Toronto at 2.30pm and so i had time to go check for my "Perfume", and i did found it... so i'm happy now! Quite! It took an hour but there it was at Young street "Sell it all" Shop!
After that no, more time left, time to catch a Cab and go straight to the auditio spot!
I got there... girls all over in all types of outfits, some of them rehearsing dance steps, i saw only 3 guys... pretty quiet!
Fill out the form, took the snap shot, waited for an hour till they called my name...
Let me tell you, i wasnt in a good mood at all, i hate waiting, specially having all 12 year old screaming around!
Ok... i got into the the audition room... i said: Hello!
Powerhouse Woman there said: "So PaOlo, is that your name?"
Me: "yeah sure, but its said: PAUUUULO"
PH Woman: "ok, do you dance?" (duh... what a hell was i doing there if i didnt)
Me: "hahahahaha, yeah, i went to school for it" (like, are you stupid or what?)
PH Woman: "what type? cuz we need people that can dance it coreographed" (is she dumb?... Help!)
Me: "hahhahahaha, (kind of saying go to hell) what exactly do you want me to show you?"
PH Woman: "Ok (kind of saying we got here an asshole) have you prepared the 2 min. coreography?"
Me: "uhm... i had no ideia i had to..."
PH Woman: "Ok, well, go head, slide, we play the music, you just groove into it" (she had an Evil look in her eye)

They were like 4 people inside of the room, the music played, i started to groove into it, when i heard... STOP! Its fine!
I Stopped, i said: "Thank You very much" (leaving the room)
When i heard: "are you the kid from Ottawa, you came all the way in for this?"
Me: "(in a sarcastic tone) yes, all the 5 hours way straight here for this"
Other PH Woman 2: "we apreciate your time, thank you very much"

I mean, if people cant take their job seriously, i do take mine, if they talk as if they dont know what they are doing, how am i suppose to react to such absurd questionary?...
I know, my attitude wasnt the most adequate, but... i woke up early, spent 5 hours sit in a fucking bus, i went there on time, had to wait an 1 hour, with no strech, beside the fact that i just got back from L.A., and i'm fucking exausted and i was starving! Those are the things that i can never say, cuz i have to be smilling and pretending that i am gourgeous and confident!
Yes, no, i didnt got the Job, cuz i was probably an asshole, i know, but i was more upset by the fact that i didnt get the whole information about what was i suppose to do, and the fact that i hate when young girls are ahead of castings, cuz that means that you have to lick their asses, and thats something i dont do! LOL...
Good thing is, when i was leaving the place, this young man came to me, asking me to do another audition the next day, and when i was about to grab a cigarrette to relief my stress, this old lady said: "you got it cuz you are cute"
LOL... i said: "i dont think so"
She said: "you have a very good look, do you wanna come for an audition tomorrow?"
i said: "i'm affraid one of your mates had already made the approach..."
She said: "ok well, so then tomorrow at 11.15am, we will wait for you"(she lighten off the cigarrette)
I said: "ok tomorrow i ll be here (again) i'm Paulo" (we shaked hands)
She said: "i'm Gloria (something)... i'm the director"
LOL... if you can talk to God why care about what Jesus said.
She said she would call my Agent about them she also mentioned: "i love Angie and Lou they are the best"...
(she walked in)
i was excited, cuz i just had a total audition failure, but something bigger was coming next!
Unfortunatly she got over excited and they wanted me not to be there today, but tomorrow, the truth is... i am working tomorrow in Montreal, shooting my sitcom, and i have the rest of the week booked in Ottawa, i had to cancel the audition! I still had to go to work after all!
Well, next time Gloria!

Bottom line: i'm having a bad time accepting the fact that i didnt book the job, and also i have to say that i rarely fail an audition, i got most of them in my life, LOL... well, sometimes when you think you are it all, something smaller comes and let you know that it isnt quite true! There is my lesson, Paulo you can be good for some people, you are not good to all of them! LOL...

Soundtrack: Wannabe, by: Miss Swan!

"The Dreamer" is over!

10 years ago, i lost my virginity, the same night after, long hours of sex and multiple orgasms, i had a shower and i needed some perfume, as it was an habit for me to wear cologne everyday, and i was given a lil sample bottle of "The Dreamer", and i heard: "my ex wears that, its versace, its new"... (stupid bitch, you took away my pureness and talking about the ex?) Lets see the "bright side" you introduced me to what had become the Fragrance of a Decade! ahhahahaha...
I dont know if it was cuz i had fucking great sex for the first time, but when i openned the bottle, i instantly loved the smell of it... it was probably the "MEDUSA" effect (Medusa is a Goddess that if you looked at her in the eyes you could never get your eyes off her)... its also the symbol used by Versace (R.I.P.). Truth is i was never able to stop wearing the perfume... i fell in love with the scent of it... what a exquisite combination!!
Its been 10 years, i never wore another fragrance, if you know me, you know what i am talking about, the way i smell its like a "Brand", its registed, most of you enjoy it... hahahahahahahaha... i've changed so many things in my life, i never changed the way i smell!
Unfortunatly it was not a Best Seller and the Versace company, stop manufacturing it... and now, my last bottle is over and i cant find it anywhere...
So my dear friends thats the part where you pump in... go to the "Perfumary" close to you... and if you find a bottle of "the dreamer" let me know or just be nice and ship it to me!LOL... i'm sure you havent given me a birthday gift yet! LOL...
As for me i'll keep praying: "... Versace, nao sou digno que estejas no meu Armario, mas este perfume seu, bastaria para salvar-me... Amen"

I already wrote to Donatela, but i figure that its gonna take a while! I need it now! I get nauseous if i wear another one! You wouldnt undertand its been 10 years! LOL...

Aight.. so what are you waitting for? Plizzz go!

Soundtrack: Tell Him, by: Celine Dion and Barbara Streissand (everything started with this song)

"The Witches of Beverly Hills"

Do you remenber that movie called, "The Witches of Eastwick" ?

If you dont, you should watch it... first time i saw it i was like 7 years old, and i kept it recorded in my mind... up till a couple of months ago when i re-watched it after finally finding it at HMV store!

I think, the reason why, its cuz i always wanted to have special powers, well, i'm already doing it in fiction, with the Power Rangers, but i always wanted to find those two other friends to do "The Craft" with... and i think i found them! LOL...

So... for the new "The Witches of Beverly Hills" instead of having: Cher, Susan Sarandon and Michelle Pfeiffer... you will have: Naomi Campbell, Paris Hilton and Paulo Pascoal!

You choose who plays who!

Now we just have to find the victim, in the original was Jack Nicholson (is he dead yet?)

This ideia was given to me by Diego.

A good potencial for the role, would be Ray DeRousse! LOL... (always wanting to kill my girls)

But our list has a lot more than that:

Oprah Winfrey (nothing is really new and fresh if there is no Gay on it, she could spend on us too)

Donald Trump (he really needs some hair advices, he is looking for a wife, we dont mind having a lil of the Trumps Empire)...

LOL... argh... it could go a lil longer... but...

As for new hotties in the market, the girls said: "Fuck Brad Pitt, Fuck Tom Cruise"

Lets bring to the table: Channing Tatum and Wentworth Miller! (if you look like that email me, you could have a role in the movie, LOL)...

" the girls wouldnt mind a channing tattoo, they would've went worth miles for it"

even tho we could choose some other hot fresh women... its enough with Naomi and Paris, they dont wanna lose the spotlight!

I have to give a shout to them: "Naomi its your 20th aniversary of career with sucess, Cheers babe, you are HOT eternely... Paris, Congrats you are the most over-rated person in the world, classified by the Guiness Book, you made history already, thats my girl!" hahahaha...

As for me... i just signed my biggest movie contract of all the times... by now! (",).

Well.. Ok OK... that was a trip... i loved it! Thanks... keep yourself Posted!

Soundtrack: Hollywood, by: Madonna!

Beverly Hills Exit!

Oh wow, here i'm again! Not happy at all... LOL... i just cant relate to this kind of life style, but something pushes me to it!... its scary to look at sunset blvd and see all the rolls-royces and the barbies that own them, its almost depressing, i wonder? is it cuz i cant have one yet? I dunno... but i'm not the envy type of guy! Sorry, this piece of town its so superficial that i cant tell if i'm talking to a real woman or to a Barbie, feels like when i was a kid and i could only think about playing with dolls! i do wanna play with them tho!

LOL... my room-mate Ajay, is like a barbie in a male form... can he bend? he is adorable! I've been now in my room for 4 hours, the night is coming and i'm almost scared to go to the streets... is it contagious? will i get like that if i stay here any longer?

Bah... and this hotel room? ish... everything is so... white, pink and gold! Just like the people, so much tanning, and blonds in pink clothes! are they for real? Everyone looks the same!LOL... i think i should prolly get one of my bathroom utencils and try to sell it in the black market!

Do they really believe in living like this? LOL... and i complain about my brothers, when there is people that only think about parties, plastic surgery, and hooking up with the directors, everyone is an actor, i'm fucked! LOL... West Hollywood is not very far from here tho... too bad i'm leaving tomorrow, at the end... i think i do wish a lil of this... let me call Paris Hilton... its time for a Beverly Hills Exit...

I'm coming out so you better get the party started, says: Pink!

Soundtrack: Stupid Girls, by: P!nk!

Where Am I From?

YES! do you know those flags? LOL... they are all from PALOP (Portuguese Spoken Countries)... Its Mom+Dad=Me. LOL...

But, even though i was born in Portugal, and i have a social security number and i pay for taxes there too, i dont own a Passport from there, and why? cuz the federal law says so.

Meaning: The law in Portugal that says that who is born in Portugal is a portuguese citizen was banned in 1981 after the enormous flux of imigrants from Africa: Angola, Mocambique, Guine Bissau, Cabo-Verde. Which were colonies of the Portuguese State untill 1975. Yes, Africa speaks portuguese too! But in my case, being from 1983, and being son of foreign parents, the state considers me an accident, meaning... its like as if my parents where travelling, my mom was pregnant and i was born while they were passing through Portugal... does it make any sence... arent pregnant women un-able to travell after the 7th month? i wasnt premature! Not only that but also the fact that my parents lived a "long beautifull love story" 6 years till i was born! So they were residents! Well... what i need is a Lawyer! So please... I'm waitting! Its now convinient for me to be a part of the European Comunity!

Soundtrack: We are the World, by: Michael Jackson and Friends!

Janet Jackson Video: Together Again!

After mentioning the Janet Jackson video, on the post: "Eye Candy for Keisha Chante", i received requests for this video, most of you dont remenber the video, also i didnt know most of you at the time! (i'm the skinny dancer on the back with blue hair) Oh Man, i was so Young, this is one of the things i'm most proud of! LOL... Good times, Good Times!

Movie: Little Miss Sunshine!

If you wanna know the 9 steps of the Program: "winner and losers"...

If you wanna know the reality of a lot of "American Families", kind of: Spears and Simpson, in the early career...

Go see this Movie, with a gentle touch of cruel humor is one of the best i've seen lately!

Obrigado David pelo convite!

Little Miss Sunshine Soundtrack! (not available yet)

Eye-Candy for Keshia Chante!

Keshia Chante is a very talent girl, from O-town, that had a big time Hit, Unpredictable, she was only 15 years, that was 3 years ago (that means that now she is actually 18, humm!) Good Stuff!

Anywho, Keshia is coming back, with her new album, and the first single, already playing in the radio "been gone" and now is time for shooting the video...

My agent called me saying: "Paulo they read your Resume, they saw Janet Jacksons video, they really want you to be the lead guy... i dont think they can do any better than you in Ottawa...and Keisha said, please make him come" LOL...

BAH... what a love in my career is that i've done a lot of different crap: from Giant Tiger flyers, to Target ads and comercial, from Gap to D&G, from extras roles to lead roles, from back up dancer to eye-candy to broadway, from back vocals to having albums out, from Loreal spray boxes to Samsung, from shows in the Mall to fashion weeks! I just really enjoy what i do, and the fact that i dont get over exposed! I've even done Lavalife, for godsakes! LOL...

Hey Keshia... unfortunatly i'm leaving to L.A. and i wont be able to make it!

I wish you all the best, i read the whole story for the video, i think its "Sick"... doing the type: "Save the Last dance", "Step Up" kind of video always works, i love that you are using Ballet dancers on it too, the shoot its gonna be in Toronto on the 25th... Dancers that are interested... call me or email me, i'll hook you up, for tomorrow at 1pm in Toronto!

Keshia your song is HOT!

Soundtrack: Been Gone, by: Keshia Chante!

Naked in a NightClub! (the Craziest Story ever)

Fact! A couple of Months ago, May, i was in Toronto for a week of work, finishing exactly on a Sunday...

I had met new friends, the Shim sisters (Janet, Stacey and Gina), i was excited about it, they are from Korea, and i want to have Koreanegro kids, so you know... LOL...

It was prolly the week i did, the most this year, lots of different jobs, from comercial to ads, to videos, to fashion shows, i was even recording a tv show called, Degrassi- the next generation, and i was auditioning for HairSpray!

But for some reason, i couldnt stop partying either...

I partied like an animal from thursday to saturday, and i was also not sleeping properly cuz i had to work early mornings... sunday came i was still partying, and working... but it was the day i had to go back home, so i decided to take the bus at 12 (midnight) going back home.

Before that, after work, i called Janet and she said: "Paulo, go to CZ nightclub, and wait for me there, i ll go pick you up"

I said: "ok, i will be waitting there for ya"

and so i did... i went to the Bar and i had 2 beers while talking with a group of Brazilian girls.

and for my "Sadness", thats all i remenber... it was 7pm in the afternoon.

Next thing i know:

I was in the Hospital, with 3 cops in front of me, one of them a female, and a guy in white, i suppose a doctor... they were looking very concerned and trying to talk to me... i couldnt see clearly, it felt like i was dreaming, till i heard: "do you think he was raped?" (said the female cop).

Suddenly what felt like a dream, was my reality, yes, i really was in the hospital, and i wasnt dreaming of "sexy hot cops"in uniforms... it was my reality... not as great as it sounds tho!

I looked down my body, and i was wrapped in orange sheets, under that, i was butt naked, not even my underwear was there, i panic, i was shocked, i started to cry like... (my biggest fear in the world had just happenned: i was raped). The only thing i could say was: "Please help me".

They tried to calm me down (impossible mission at the time), they asked me if i could say what happenned, if i knew where i was... i said: "confort zone night club".

They looked at me like: Ok another one of those cases.

The doctor said: "i'm gonna take you to examination now, and the cops will do their job"

I kept crying...

The cops left, i went to the examination room... we got started!

(even tho i should prolly worry about other things, like diseases, i just couldnt deal with the ideia of having my "virgin ass" invaded by a stranger)

I let the doctor do their job!

Then he told me: "you were not raped, you are fine, the cops found you naked in the park, do you have any ideia of what happenned?"

While he said that i had a vision, like flashes in my mind: "a man hitting me on my stomach" the other: "me looking down to my red shoes while walking" and then another: "and old man with an ambulance"...

I never mention anything to him... i kept myself quiet, i wasnt sure!

and then he said: "... you came with the ambulance not long ago, your eyes were always openned but your brain was SHUT..."

That was like the CRAZIEST thing that i ever heard about me!

After a while:

The cops came back, the girl was holding a blue bag, she had a smily face, the guys were kind of gigling...

I thought: "do they think this is funny?"

One of the male cops said: "bro, you are fine, nothing happenned to you, you were not raped, you just drunk too much, and you started taking your clothes off in the club, and they kicked you out".

I looked at him like: "whatta hell are you saying?"

The female cop said: "yes, you took your pants off and put them under the speaker, your shirt you put above the bar, and then you took your underwear off and lay down on a couch they have there..."

FUCK, you know folks, i am not even the type of guy that takes the shirt of when i'm in the club, it doesnt matter how hot it is i always keep my clothes on, it all sounded ridiculous to me.

The cops handed me the blue bag, inside of it were my clothes, my phone, my wallet, everything. They said: "you go home and rest bro..." and left laughing.

I felt so Stupid, yeah, so embarassed... i said: "i didnt even drink that much, i had 2 beers"

The doctor asked me: "which day is today?"

I said: "The 18th?"

He explained: "yeah you see thats when your brain SHUT off, today is the 21st of May, you probably have been working hard, you are over exausted, and sometime your body reacts like that, even tho you thought you were fine to go party, your body needed rest, and as you didnt, your body did it itself, while you were at the club your brain went to sleep, you created your own "confort zone" (the same name as the club), i suppose your room, the places where you put your clothes, you transported them to the club, and the couch was your bed, and as you sleep naked, you got naked, exposed"...

I was Perplexed... but it all made a lot of sence to me!

I thought: "wow i'm going to bed before i start jerking off here too" LOL...

YEAH, i wasnt raped, but it was fucking scary.

He told me to have some vitamins: E and Omega 3... and get lots of Rest in the next days!

I called Janet, she was crazy looking for me...

When she came she was like: "Paulo what happenned to you? i tried talking to you in the club, but you wouldnt answer me, i thought you were upset cuz i was late..."

LOL... the shit that happens to me... hey, please dont tell this to the Press, ok? LOL... and oh... my blood was clean too!

My advice: "always make sure you get some rest".

Soundtrack: Party all the Time, by: Sharam.

Danielle et Moi!

Danielle is my dearest friend, she is 23, and she is a marathon runner...
A girl that has energy all the time, full-time, she is just non-stop...
Never loses the day light even when she had been working the whole night...
Instead of having alcohol, or drugs, she grabs a couple of redbulls and she is ready to go...
Even Montreal , for me, has a whole new "enchant" after meeting Danielle..
Living in Montreal would be so hard without you Danielle...
Last time i saw her, was on Sunday, but i miss her like crazy, already...
Ending this Post i couldnt forget to mention: Saona, the prettiest "star dog" ever...
(she gets all the attention from the public and we take advantage of it...)

DANIELLE, you have such a good heart, Merci, Merci Beaucoup, for being who you are and for being now, part of my life.

Diego, Can you Tell the Differences?

Those 2 pics, where taken in 2 very different situations and locations!

one in New York, the other in Toronto.

one is a real woman, the other a drag-queen.

one was taken in 2004, the other in 2005...

But even though they are too different, they are too alike...

and so its Me and Diego. (funny is that we didnt even knew each other when those pics were taken)

Diego, is this great kid (always concerned about hooking people up, to the Best), friend of his friends, we met earlier this year, one of the reasons i decided to stay in Canada... LOL... of course... there is always something special about anyone i mention here... and so its Diego.. today is his "Birthday", he is a Leo, a Leo-Leo, argh... and so its JLo and Madonna... LOL... they are all about the Sun, the Fire, and the Ego... LOL... Hey... Diego, i think you taugh me that... now, i have to say, i dig horoscopes so much, its incredible! He is also responsable for all my fancy necklaces and bracellets and for the souleasternpop logo, for me being jealous of Lenny Kravitz and D'Angelo... (just kidding)... for me loving Shakira... LOL... uff so many things... Diego is from Colombia, he wears orange when he is happy and the weather is sunny, and green if he needs hope for a better day! he is the pure image of Tropical and Caliente (tropicaliente)! he is one of a Kind!

Feliz Cumpleanos (Cabron)... Luv ya... Keep it Real n Tight!

Soundtrack: Left & Right (feat. Method man and Redman), by: D'Angelo.

"Late Fragments" or "Gay-for-Pay"?

oh yeah.. para aqueles de voces que nao estam familiarizados com o termo gay-for-pay...

gay-for-pay: e ser gay para ser pago, ou seja o caso de 80% dos strippers para homens, ou melhor apenas 20% dos homens de dancam para homens sao gays, os outros 80% sao heterosexuais, mas o fazem por dinheiro. (odeio ter de ser tao... explicito)...

nas passadas semanas eu recebi uma proposta para representar um desses casos, num filme, o filme: Late Fragments.

a historia de Theo, um rapaz de 24 anos que foi violado com apenas 9 anos por um homem, e que nunca conseguiu superar o trauma, crescendo num ambiente perturbado, de drogas, sexo e dinheiro (para alguns de maneira facil) vendendo o corpo... Theo e um jovem heterosexual (sim ele tem uma namorada, Lea), que trabalha como stripper e prostituto num club nocturno gay, Theo e completamente desligado do corpo, tanto que o vende a homens e segue o culto de "cicatrizacao" (corta-se com laminas), o puto ta todo marado da cabeca... ate que um dia o homem que o violou a 15 anos atras, aparece no Club em que ele trabalha....

Ish, ja contei quase tudo... LOL...

agora, digam-me uma coisa... o que acham devo ou nao fazer esse papel?

ate hoje ouvi varias opinioes, mas quero ouvir mais, uma vez que elas variam imenso!

eu sei que sou capaz de representar a Theo, disso nao tenho duvida, o meu unico problema e saber que as filmagens comecam dia 1 de octubro e ate la, nao sei se conseguirei ter o corpo digno de um stripper... LOL... o que nao quero e ter o pessoal a ir ao cinema e em vez de verem um gajo todo grosso tal e qual, ver-me a mim, com as minhas perninhas... e ficarem desiludidos!

Sabem que os strippers para mim sao as pessoas mais Seguras que sao Bons a face da terra! Confidence is the Key of this world!

i'm very self-conscious, i know what i can offer, and what i cannot!

quero opinioes no domingo estarei em L.A. com a producao do Filme!

Um filme bastante, visual e grafico, nudes e parte integral da natureza artistica do filme e alguma violencia! hey, nao e pornografico e quase isso... mas o director: Daryl Cloran, disse que tudo sera levado com muito respeito e gosto num ambiente de cena fechado!

O Resultado pode ser uma "Merda" ou pode ser como foi: Angelina Jolie no GIA... tal como eu ela tb tinha 23 anos quando gravou o filme e com 29 comprou o primeiro aviao! LOL...

e como o Rodolfo disse: "Voce tem mais e que botar sua cara no Mundo"

Soundtrack: Better Man, by: Martina Sorbara.

Julio Iglesias... the Press and the Show!

... after he called me... and i was finally able to react... i started walking down, walking down, my "hall of fame", all the reporters turned around and suddenly i was the "Star"... flashes flashes... me waving like Queen Elizabeth (just kidding)... big smile... the moment had come:

"(Luck) hits Paulo Pascoal big time" (Luck=when preparation meets opportunity)

Julio asked his manager to leave the spot for me... saying: "vete, Paulo aqui es tu lugar cerca de mi"... on his right side!

with a very gentle hug and a kiss on my cheeck, there i was sharing the same Press as "Julio Iglesias" that was for the first time in Angola! (which means the whole world was there) LOL...

J.I.: "Paulo es un amigo mio, que es de aqui, Angola, vivio en donde yo naci, Espana, y vive en donde vivo, U.S.A"

he looks at me smiling as if he was proud of me, and gives me another kiss...

J.I.: "Paulo vino a presentar su primer trabajo (looked at me) , que tienes a decir de tu trabajo?"

ME: "no se, voy a dejar que el publico lo juzge"

J.I.: "no seas tan modesto... eres bueno o no eres bueno? dime? tu tienes de saber quien eres antes que te expongas al juicio" (and there was my biggest lesson ever)

Me: "soy bueno"

J.I.: "cantas bien, eres guapisimo, eres ambicioso, iras muy lejos chico, buena suerte"...

and with that i had my musical career launched...

So launched, that i openned Julio shows in there and after in the world... we kicked ass together! Oh yeah...

I started being the Open Act for several artists... under managenment of Howard Pollack!

and i had a Great 2 years, till i decided to STOP... (love problems)

I have to apolagize to Julio Iglesias, for believing in me, and getting disappointed for my not existent drive at the time.. i was too young!

10 days after that date, was the release of my first album, August 26th 2003, I Wish That I! My first little baby!

Soundtrack: Divorcio, by: Julio Iglesias.

Julio Iglesias and my 3rd Musical Aniversary!

3 years ago, today August 17, was the day that my life changed forever... LOL... (like every other day)... is it today Madonnas Birthday? i have to call that guuurl... LOL... i wish!

aight... well, yes... i was giving an interview for a tv channel in Luanda-Angola, in the pool yard of the hotel i was staying, Hotel Tropical *****! LOL... i was having a orange juice, in a round white table and Karina Barbosa, who is my agent in there was with me!

It was a sunny day, and a couple of miles away in the pool, there was the crowd of white bodies, burnning in the sun, suddenly this man, leaves the pool and comes , talks with a woman also there, his wife, and comes straight ahead, hitting my table...

saying: "bom dia, que fazem aqui, tu quem es?"( kinda, who are you?)

i said: "hola, soy Paulo, soy un cantante local" (in my perfect Castellano accent)

he said: "ah, y como hablas tan bien espanol?"

i said: "yo vivi en espana muchos anos"

he said: "pero si todavia eres muy jovenzito, y donde vives ahora, aqui no !?"

i said: "no, vivo en NYC"

he said: "que bien, yo vivo en Miami, dame tu musica, quiero oirla"

i handed him a cd...

he said: "cantas en ingles? muy bien, que internacional"

he touched my face, holding my sheen on his palm... he smiled at me and said: "que guapo!"

he left the place, drying his hair with a white towel...

and suddenly i realized... "that was Julio Iglesias"... WOW... my father (R.I.P.) "Loved this man"...

I got excited, LOL, yeah man, Julio Iglesias, an UN embassador, 70 cds released, more than god knows how many years of a brilliant career... such an inspiration...

I went to my room, yes, to rest and listen to some Julios old songs... when my room phone rang...

Me: "hello"

J.I.: "estas dormido muchacho?"

Me: "NO"

J.I.: "yo tengo una conferencia de imprensa ahora, ven a verme si quieres"

Me: "si, ahora voy"

of course, i did, how could i not go, i bet this man has a lot to talk about and so i have to Learn.

I got ready and went running to the Conference Room...

Ish... i openned the door, trying to be as silent as i could... i sit in the first chair i had close to me... at the top end of the room, everybody was at the bottom, all attent, to what he had to say... stuff like... how is the relationship with his children, how many times has he been married, why can't people photograph him from the up right side to what he responded:

"yo tengo ya muchos anos para sabesr cual es mi lado favorito"

(he likes all photogrphers under him and only taking pics of the left side of his face, this photo for example shows everything he hates hahahahaaha)... and so when someone asked:

"Julio in all the countries you go you always pick a girl to sing with you, have you heard angolan music, who are you gonna pick from Angola to sing with you?"

to what he responded:

"Paulito, ven aqui" (Paulo, come here)

LOL... GOD!... i wasnt sure of what i heard, i stood still, my legs were paralized... my body was shaking... "is he calling me there? for real?"

Paginas do meu Diario... e o Irmaos Bedinfield!

24 de Maio de 2005

Bem, Meu querido e mais confidente amigo… tenho estado bem e já se passaram anos a pensar que te devia contar coisas, já se passou tanto, mais tanto, que eu nem sei por onde comecar…
Mas vou começar pelo dia de ontem… mas antes dizer-te que já tive uma relacao de 3 anos, já lancei um cd de musica, já viajei imenso e fiz "N" de maluqueiras novas, como drogas, e ainda tou por ca, no mundo dos vivos….

23 de Maio de 2005

Neste exacto momento estou a gravar uma novela, tou em Portugal, a novela e Morangos com Acucar… uma novela para a malta jovem, as pitas, os dreads e os betos… e sobre isso tb…. LOL
Mas a verdade e que ontem o dia la no estúdio foi especial… porque veio gravar connosco uma celebridade…. Daniel Bedinfield… famoso que tem um hit worldwide known…. conhecido em todo mundo... o som… "If u are not the One"…. O mesmo que marcou o final da minha relaccao de 3 anos….
Tas a perceber???
No fim da minha relacao, este som fazia-me chorar, eu amava, porque dizia tudo que eu queria dizer e disse e dediquei o som, ao meu Amor…
Enfim o cantor veio ao estúdio gravar uma cena… foi lindo!
Mas o mais engraçado e que com mais de 30 pessoas no meio do estúdio a primeira pessoa a quem ele estendeu a mão, fui eu, e logo disse-me: "se a minha Irmã te visse saltava-te para cima…" (referindo-se a Natasha Bedinfield) LOL… é claro que eu achei super engraçado… e fiquei um pouco assustado porque afinal… a minha frente estava o rapaz que canta o som que eu mais Amei durante uns tempos… LOL…
Depois de algumas gravacoes, ele foi falar ao ouvido da assistente dele, que logo a seguir ela, a Carla, veio ter comigo, e disse: "o Daniel esta maluco contigo quer te apresentar a irmã dele e pergunta se queres ir jantar com eles dois…" eu fiquei sem ar… ela disse: "já me respondes…"
E ai tive de voltar para as gravacoes das quais já explico o que faço e quem sou na novela e tudo mais…
Enfim, aceitei o convite.
Depois das gravacoes fui ter com eles ao Hotel Pestana Palace… para a seguir levar-lhes ao Restaurante a Bica do Sapato… estes sítios são apenas os mais, mais de Lisboa… não e para toda gente… para alem de reunirem tudo o que reúne um bom hotel e um óptimo restaurante… são caríssimos…
Eu estava partido ao final do dia porque estava ainda em directa, tinha ido sair a noite anterior…

adormeci na Limo enquanto eles falavam comigo, mas mesmo assim, parece nao ter perdido o encanto, depois de uma optima jantarada, foi um optimo banho na piscina do hotel, a 3, LOL... fui o guia da estadia deles por ca, e divertimo-nos imenso! E eu e a Natasha... muito bem!

I loved the cumplicity in between them, i also read the book adviced by Daniel... "Whats so Amazing about Grace", that is now my favorite so far... its also his... this is people that come into your life to give you some light! Thanks to you Bedinfield!

After reading that page on my diary, i realized how much i've grown in only a year! Its Insane!

Soundtrack: Un-Written, by: Natasha Bedinfield.